On Peer Pressure

I was recently at a work party, at a pub, of course. I walked in, and one of the directors immediately asked,

“What’ll you have to drink?”

“A pint of cold water, please,” I replied.

The look he gave me was priceless... like I’d just announced I was joining a monastery. “A pint of what?”

I repeated myself, and after some eye-rolling, he reluctantly ordered a water from the equally bemused bar staff.

Standing there with my pint of water in hand, I lost count of how many people approached me, their faces a mix of concern and disbelief. “Are you okay?” they’d ask, as though drinking water was a clear cry for help. Another dozen or so decided to turn me into the evening’s joke, and then there were those who, with relentless determination, kept trying to press alcohol on me. They waved shots and glasses of cheap prosecco in my face, growing increasingly irate when I politely declined their “kindness.”

I’ll admit, there have been times (many times) when I’ve eventually caved. “Just one drink,” I’d say, or “Just to keep the peace.” But not this time. That night, I dug in my heels. I was as stubborn as a mule, because honestly, I’ve had enough of this nonsense.

By the evening’s midpoint, those same people were stumbling around, slurring their words, shouting inappropriate things at colleagues, and lamenting their inevitable hangovers. “I need a kebab,” someone declared, as though greasy food would somehow erase the damage before they dozed off on the wrong train home.

And me? I calmly made my way home, proud of the fact that I wouldn’t wake up feeling like death the next morning and could get on with my day.

Let me be clear: I don’t begrudge anyone their choice to drink. Your body, your decision. I’ve had my fair share of boozy nights, too, before I started caring about my health. But what I do begrudge is the peer pressure. Why is it so hard for people to accept a simple “no” when it comes to alcohol?

Sure, I could’ve grabbed a trendy non-alcoholic beer to “blend in” and dodge the ridicule, but why should I? Frankly, I’m not interested in the empty calories.

What I’ve learned (far too late in life) is that it’s okay to not fit into someone else’s definition of “normal.” After all, what is normal?

The great Stoic philosopher Seneca once said, “Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness.” That resonates with me now more than ever.

And another thing I’ve learned? Not to care what other people think.

So, if you ever find yourself at a party, a gathering, or even alone with a partner, and someone insists you take a drink you don’t want, pause. Look at the glass, the bottle, the label. And then think about your future. Think about how you want your story to unfold. Think about your children, your grandchildren, the nurses and doctors you might one day rely on.

And then, politely but firmly, say no.

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